lettres.. pour les possede

i wrote more then enough all over paper..

he did so.. long ago..

Le Possédé

Le soleil s'est couvert d'un crêpe. Comme lui,
Ô Lune de ma vie! emmitoufle-toi d'ombre
Dors ou fume à ton gré; sois muette, sois sombre,
Et plonge tout entière au gouffre de l'Ennui;

Je t'aime ainsi! Pourtant, si tu veux aujourd'hui,
Comme un astre éclipsé qui sort de la pénombre,
Te pavaner aux lieux que la Folie encombre
C'est bien! Charmant poignard, jaillis de ton étui!

Allume ta prunelle à la flamme des lustres!
Allume le désir dans les regards des rustres!
Tout de toi m'est plaisir, morbide ou pétulant;

Sois ce que tu voudras, nuit noire, rouge aurore;
II n'est pas une fibre en tout mon corps tremblant
Qui ne crie: Ô mon cher Belzébuth, je t'adore!

— Charles Baudelaire

a one last drop of words for you .

because now i know you will know where to read my consciousness up in the air.
i will none the less be unfair, because you are being so right to me, and it's not today the day that i'll start filtrating my words, i am way too wacko to do such thing. a weekend like this, i must have looked bored at this cocktail soiree but i was not, sometimes i make a move on my own, unexpected, without really a clue my night could go wrong or right .. but i love these nights where you get so deep in the space inside . but you look out for those people you have just met because your instinct tells you they will be in it for the long run, for when you leave, and come back you will smile together and still laugh and drop in your head, there will always be there for ever. maybe not . but i am tired maybe . my mind is so awake, as soon as i got back into petra's castle for the hard clouded kids grown ups, i see she hasn't slept yet , an dif she doesn't the brain tells the heartt it fell in pain , mis-drained... so i tell her to go .. sleep. i will stay up and pack and clean, and i know i will look like i have gone back into my 18th birthday's rave party tomorrow, but all the stuff is no wready to go down the stairs, for yard in sale. tomorrow sunday , le jour du seigneur, an di shal take it off to pray thy clouds turning grey in a constant movement because couch surfing is a story, to couchsurf under rain fall is always crazy.
but you get use to crazy, more like you see crazy , and non je ne vais pas me detourner de mes obstacles in everyday.
tonight , i felt release after i talk to the one i heard you say you were too soon to run away. and i know i can be more then fast into suceptibility ( is it really a word) but i react always faster then the running rabbit. oui oui oui .vrai il dit.

people are right when they say it takes times and words, and tralalalalala to get to know someone, il y a l'envie de savoir, et aussi la peur de ne pas percevoir ce qu'on a deja reve en ces amours passes.
but i think we both have the eyes of the tiger you tought i shall say .
l'oeil de l'idolatrie, comme dans ces chansons in all those melody that drove the pirates crazy when they heard mermaids inside , perfect illusion desire insane you will not reach. but i know it's not always so easy but i saw us hands in hands looking a little further, then those parc we see in the greater toronto, cafes and paves i waited for but there is another picture wild to see. and i want to taste the feeling of your hands surrounding me next to the sea.. no commitment, au dela, if you read in between my words you will see i am seeking a feeling far from dependency, it's in my eyes , and my body i wanna be free of my most destructible desire, and fulfill the rest of my senses with the only thing that can go through me . they all-ready think i would spit into you love but the words that can only be is the feelings there is .. les emotions, surgissent on the surface of skin, in knotted stomach and head-dreams speeding too fast you canot sleep.. . well right now i .. went out there on the balcony , the rain finally stops. but i was hoping to get showered . another day, when i expected less. in the end even awake i am still wondering what goes on in your head when you fell asleep. do you miss me. or will you miss me when i'm gone. i could act like no one care but i do... and i want to see you . but i want you to see me better. it takes a lot of fragile inside me to say it the way it ain't so easy to let go when it feels crazy. and c'est comme ca vont les habitudes, they are crazy and i feel sometimes sorry but also it becomes like family. a little too easy. say you were here with me... but it feels good on my own.

i want you to want me .... and i want me to be steady, the way dancer stops in circles suspended in the air, la musique des harmony.. balance. the perfect cut can only be perform by sharpened blade in duality .
the word can be said in more then you tought there would only be one way.. the dance in between ces etres opposees. i dare you to stay . and the pressure get tamed will one day run away.. i am heavy heart in love with melancholy, but you are parts of a crystal puzzle, the expressions in your face is far from simple. my sweet walking puzzle, i know passion can be drawn and love can be misunderstood, life goes so fast we are running away , and that's why i will be patient but i never let go of those gemstone . still soft . it could be precious


Crystallography (from the Greek words crystallon = cold drop / frozen drop, with its meaning extending to all solids with some degree of transparency, and graphein = write) is the experimental science of determining the arrangement of atoms in solids. In older usage, it is the scientific study of crystals.

here again. les mots fall en douceur.

it feels good tonight finally the day was endless, warm in the sun and riding arround in-town. trying to find something special, like the way i want our story to be , nothing really to predict, to worry, to prepare... the past is there suppose to show you better, the way you read book to help you realize there is millions stories alive and the ones i crave for are the ones you see on screen, in books, in flashes or pregnant moment going fast at a speed i know , 24 images a second the measure of sinema, and the film has it's score... and you know what .. the city surrounding us right now has way ridiculous to manipulate the pictures they see, the way they shall be, oh play for me , but let me tell you in ages a-day there is not many people strong and truth enough, real in the emotions they are made off .. to play .. live.
la comedia del arte, or the drama, romance absurd are free upon my way, la vie n'est pas si rose. it is black tinted white shadows and dancers in terrible nights it migth rain , an artist shall be aware of the details to deal with, if you see it sour, you have not given yourself a chance to taste life's flavour. . i am willing to go through all that it comes towards my way , flavours n trouble and struggles i am here to stay... but again tonight i felt it inside me the reason why my next coming month will be dense in work and sweat my body melt into sharpened blade. and i will go away, and i don't want to be hurt before i even move away, i have met you and your conscience and awareness, you listen to me , and it happens my eyes are filled with waters and pain for what i go through, but i have learned to go deep inside my flesh , and it's old and i am young again. and i am a children of love , will always be.. it doesn't need to be put into words the way we choose to see the love arround us, more like the actions, movements, reactions, consciousness of the air arround me. i am listening to the cure. and i think of all my old loves i went through their faces like i knew from the begining they would make my history, the ride worth to be rode, in circles and circles my eyes will see and in other people's eyes i saw love , and i saw fear , and i saw how in intimacy they were into me , and i was into theirs, and when i ride my bike alone at night or move my hands on the paper like there is no time to sleep, maybe it has something to do with all the nights i slept without you , thinking of you .. and you . and recently i have been going down , less of a better pillow for you to rest your head over, and i feel sorry you don't need my apology i would rather show you i can be easy .
i never expected in life to find someone like me, and i have had those conversation with old friends lately on how people in friendship meet , la rencontre des etres se fait de plus en plus posee, and i know it's insane to show yourself, go deeper and be vulnerable, strong and week, scared or esseulee the childrens in our eyes are diamonds most will loose by trying to stand up for a society O community in needs to be redefine... i was just there in montreal a week ago to see old friends i have been through thunder rain an dour brain sometimes insane, after days awake and the past memory lane are tattoos underneath your skin.. .it reflects.
but who am i to judge someone, because it has happened to me , and i will quote here again my dearest friend shawnda, a pirate in it for the long run, the type of people i hope they know they can call me at 4 in the morning and if they ever need me , i will run by them, i will tell my work and bricks arround me they shall fear me, i will be there , if only ..
you and you and you and all of the news and old dancers in my breaking life was hard but always in an harmony. y'alll should know i am not perfect and i expect nothing to be so, but i demand loyalty, us to stay together and help out each other, i find people so different then me, and i don't always agree or understand, but i respect.
respect is more then a word it's a freaking attitude.
maybe all of us should go on a one-day career into animal life, be a cameleon and you will attend more lands and species you have tought you knew really how they were, be my raging tiger and we will fight together and create, but also be my vulnerable goat i will not let you walk on broken glasses i have done it before and it's not really. for everybody.
but be a seductive cat on a rooftop the city we shall lay ourself and bodies in the wind, feel fresh i can breathe, trapped me in a cage like a lion i will be o.k. one day i might jump right over your head so high no one will never catch me unless they know how to be my tamer.

so i will tame my own self into sheets for a night finally dreams awake felt better i will remember, five star in the morning.. i hope you had a good rest..
turn off the computer go outside see the day will start just there so softly right in front of me ...

reserve the battery

o technology telling me soon you might dare to delete my words. i just suggest you not to even dare .. since i am out there when i should be into my dreams .. but i sleep like a dead engine... only i awake remember the stories in futile melody going through my head ... and it feels good .. so good .. with .. the music once my dear old bleoo told me mazzy star would always be a hell of an endless serenade .. for all those night you feel alone . in bed curled up into my sheet . i can let go . and i know in the end all will be o.k .. and my dear sweatheart you are away tonight .. and tomorrow i'll be on my way starting an era of surfing couches and streets in the city i find sometimes cold ... there will always be music in my eyes in order to warm me up.. t

tomorrow another working day.. and soon i shall be elaborate to tell you my heart is turn on by the art .. of living . i cannot fear to love you .. and i will not weight you are something coming to me slightly you have been more then the perfect light breeze into my lung and running veins..
where ever you are .. i send you lanes of a serenade modern...sous l'espace au-dela de mon regard .

stabat mater ..

the melody have found me straight through the line mediane in the day when i feel the breeze of loneliness piercing my mind. not that this feeling is empty au contraire it is sometimes too dense, for my ownself, what to do. outside this world, and i like to go into my head only in a chaos i feel tender my blood dilates. and today is a long day, and i need to stay away from you , i need to navigate in the islands alone inner persona. and to this music needs a scenery unbelievable, the ocean raging de preference, the wind a must, rain can fall, as long as i can be warm inside. imagine the feeling of being drugged by someone's arms, soft but precise the movements shall be. and the noise are no longer terrible, the chaos you ear downtown on a weekday when chimpanzee not always so well... behave in the streets . la de-ambule des corps febriles et pourtant je me dois de sentir . se mouvoir de soi-meme. an hour then two with a friend , baking flesh under sun getting deeper and i kept moving a little more north, to where i might stop for a scotch in words, i don't do prose, i lined the words like white clouds of fading tar elaborates from the chain smoker.

i am a train . in a movie where the shutters are low in times. less then the essence of sinema , 24;1 is a luxury for amateur, i crave the avant-garde of technology, and here don't get me wrong i am certainly not talking about your computerize manic attention you are nothing to what life can do by itself when the body becomes the fine brush it can be , the dancers are moving the way reality needs to be shaken. all that impossible without the melody i can be.

i have been seeing you lately and sometimes we all worry looking at the world to show us what love should be . but even here in kanada they are all sometimes a hiding re-play of what american cinema tried to be . far lands from a world only fellini could create. from a romantic , trepide words in exchange back and forth between lovers hiding behind the lenses of a master in a breathless sort of french avant-garde. the only lessons i kept a fair souvenir from, godard was a key to what life can be .. you shot her from the right angle, and she shall will fall opposite . there is no need of reality only hearts can see. what there is to feel.

and i believe the way animals wild trust their flair, feroce envy to walk, traces of tender paws into a jungle no one see. aware i can be , and i will miss you , and there is nothing wrong with that. nothing really.
seulement je suis nee de cette race qui pour autant mes sentiments se sont fait fracasser i bleed a certain hope that will always taste sweeter boiled like the perfect sinner. i believe there is more complexe in all i can see through the day, but my heart is a serious cells holding century of swords went through only to sharpened it like a deadly knife, and i will not hurt you. and you will not hurt me .
day light teaches you better then complains , and the nights were born for the lovers .

i will stop for now the serenade non pas moderne, but there is a melody in my vein when i hear the sounds you are feeling good even lorsque ton regard je peut percevoir sans meme te voir .. deviens sombre. je coulerai des soleils d'un rouge feroce si souple . and will i dance for you .
maybe so .. dare we to invite one and another or will you push me fall into another trolley .
i told you i don't do highway , i like rollercoaster
alive or capture.
l'instant se fait pregnant en ta presence.
et de ton absence, j'occupe mes mains a la danse , l'echos de mon corps en encre sleeps for you .