jamais n'est-ce le dernier mot.

pas ce soir. il se fait deja tard mais j'en ai rien a foutre. je suis toujours seule, and even tough les dames de la maison are the rares i wanna see when i'm already deep into my bubble, a little shaky in a good way , i need tea. i made tea. it's that easy sometimes, when i am on the road most of the time my back is breaking from the weight i carry but i have everything i need to be. i always envy the ones i see with bags so small life is more easy but i remember this man that told me when he needed to train himself and feel healthy all there was to do is take a bag and walk nowhere and further with it. simple but there is all the tool they have created, the day i know i can protect myself completely with the strenght of my mind, of my hands, and survive endlessly , i will also be ready to die. not envious , only ready for when i have to go where no one know. i sound calm about it , as a cat i have already lost a good half of it, and pushed my body and soul in extreme ways , not very conventional shall i say but even when i realize and think back about the roads i took, and how maybe faster would i have done all i had to do if i had kept myself in what they call 'le droit chemin' but if i think of my right side, and all the stories that created me, inked sur la droite, it reflects love, and love you better be ready to ride if you want to go through . these loves are now peacefull( almost ) in my life, still there to stay . but . truth is i can change the subject insanely that i remember shit and i rarely go back into my words.
it never was suppose to be that easy to read someone's mind anyway , there is clear days, and fuzzy night to breathe in . i see clear but i desire way more then the keyboard my hands are dancing strangely over..
you came back , i don't need name because i have ways to dreams about who knows, still hunting me. and lover i create while they were friends alive and there for me to see and be, a better reason for sinematic story for insomniac in need to stay calm, but i run away late at night in search of my reality, i am truly not the kind to stay in comforting bed alone jerkin' off. i like it better when i can feel the wanting right from under my belt.when i ride inside. out. and more on the surface of my skin. i am missing like insane your body i never would have tought could take me the way i always wanted to . your eyes sweet but your arms twitching to hold me still, the way you want me. ce qui me manque encore plus ce sont ces nuits ou j'ai sentie ton corps en relache, all of you letting go, vulnerable but have you a clue i was going to hold you , and never play you unfair. i did in the way i have grown with unusual talking habit, an dno one arround me to talk about all that was in my head, and this head of mine always so fast moving, i imagine everyone will do the same. but there i was wrong. i wish i woul dhave been there longer to learn more of who you are, not the way you look, what stroke inside your stomach, and i hope the one that will ever go there will do it softly, because i know i have been push so hard to show the inside of my guts, and it creates sweet angel like me who are double edge blade with no mercy .


again . a suivre . soon. tant qu ela bulle n'eclate , there will be time .

the song i adore you gave me what feels like ages ago. but you'll alway sbe my favorite memory. the melody left me sensation prints are deep in me, the bullet red that never came out from the back. still intact , an installation inside my heart.
art to live forever.

pj. harvey

Long goes the night
Longer the day
Teclo your death
Will send me to my grave

I learned to beg
I learned to pray
Send me his love
Send him to me again
Let me ride
Let me ride
Let me ride on his grace for awhile
Let me ride
Let me ride
Just let me ride on his grace for awhile

Long goes the night
Longer the days
Teclo your death
Will send me to my grave
Let me ride
Let me ride
Just let me ride on his grace for awhile
Let me ride
Let me ride
Just let me ride on your grace for awhile
Just let me ride



on the road i will never fear to ride this way .